The rest I spent foolishly.” —George Raft, film star, “I was going to sue for defamation of character, but then I realized I have no character.” —Charles Barkley, TV basketball analyst, “I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. Good.” —Moms Mabley, “Washington is a city of Southern efficiency and Northern charm.” —President John F. Kennedy. Funny quotes for all. “Wine; a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy.” —Benjamin Franklin, “Why beer is better than wine: human feet are conspicuously absent from beer making.” —Steve Mirsky, author, “The Democrats are the party that says government will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove crabgrass on your lawn.” —P. The holidays are the most wonderful time of the year, but sometimes, it may not feel that way. And they have. Good but not that good be amazing much more funny and cool things for kid and adults I read these yo myself I … There’s nothing like a funny quote to relax an audience and make them receptive to hearing what you have to say. Never waste any time you can spend sleeping. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. Enjoy these funny quotes about time: Time is a waste of money. 2 People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy. What’s Christmas time to you but a time for paying bills without money; a time for … Some of these quotes are so cheeky they remind me of the old-fashioned school master practice of placing a child in the corner with a dunce's cap on because he or she did not do their homework or could not answer the question. 20396 likes. 1 Love is sharing your popcorn. December is here before it’s June. Explore 73 Time Travel Quotes by authors including Stephen Hawking, Katherine Jenkins, and James Altucher at BrainyQuote. Enjoy life. We’re rarely aware of the bullets we dodge. “That feels just as smooth and as nice as my wife’s behind,” he said. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. 1. (For even more quotes, have a look at our selection of The Best Relationship Quotes). Where did daylight savings time originate in the first place? All of them are awesome. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. These are easy to read list of the most hilarious phrases ever spoken to make your day. “User: the word computer professionals use when they mean ‘idiot. Authors; Collections; Quotes; Topics • • • Quotes. Take care C. chris on September 02, 2018:. Here are a few quotes by the well-regarded leader. “I admit that I live in the past, but only because housing is so much cheaper.” —Matt Wohlfarth. Anonymous. The two most powerful warriors are patience and time. Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of 30. good. Time Quotes. Connelly, running his own hand over his head, remarked, “So it does!” If you need a break from laughing at the funniest quotes ever, check out these peace quotes from some of the world’s wisest leaders. Don’t spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door. Then I want to move in with them.” —Phyllis Diller, “I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.” —Jimmy Kimmel, “As far as I’m concerned, ‘whom’ is a word that was invented to make everyone sound like a butler.” —Calving Trillin, “I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.” —Anonymous, “Here’s some advice: At a job interview, tell them you’re willing to give 110 percent. Seeing a male dog sniffing a female dog, the young daughter of Laurence Olivier asked Noël Coward what they were doing. Just as only time can heal his broken arms and legs. “You can fail at what you don’t want—so you might as well take a chance at doing what you love.” —Jim Carrey. Anonymous. Some of these are funny travel quotes from movies, others are more quotes for your travel friends. Charles Schultz. Our best quotes about time will be interesting to both children and adults because they contain a lot of useful things. See more ideas about christmas quotes, christmas humor, funny. Given here are a few more funny quotes and sayings that will be a treat to your sense of humor. Number two is death. 45+ of our best funny quotes and sayings about time. Unless the job is a statistician.” —Adam Gropman, “As wonderful as dogs can be, they are famous for missing the point.” —Jean Ferris, “A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.” —Steve Martin, “I love deadlines. Aside from velcro, time is the most mysterious substance in the universe. We recommend our users to update the browser. “Today was good. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. Check out these daily life cartoons that will also have you laughing on the floor. "Every time you are able to find humor in a difficult situation, you win." “Time decides who you meet in life, your heart decides who you want in your life, and your behavior decides who stays in your life.” funny quotes and sayings pictures #2. Leonard Nimoy was asked by a woman, “Are you aware that you [as Spock] are the source of erotic dream material for ladies around the world?” Nimoy’s reply: “May all your dreams come true.”, “You know there’s a problem when you realize that out of the three Rs, only one begins with an R.” —Dennis Miller, comedian, “To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.” —Oscar Wilde, “He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.” —Billy Wilder, director, “She loves nature in spite of what it did to her.” —Bette Midler. Of course! 3. "One day you're the best thing since sliced bread. “Laughing is the best medicine. Hilarious Jokes and Funny Pics / The Funniest Quotes Of All Time; 77 Best Funny Love Quotes That Will Make You Laugh. “Laugh it off. Daylight Saving Time Quotes: 9 Sayings About Changing Clocks An Hour. Love, which is an intense emotion, also has a humorous side to it. I use three adjectives to describe them: satirical, funny, and profound. Top 10 Famous Political Sex Quotes. 1. Dumbest Political Quotes of All Time. A day wasted on others is not wasted on one’s self. You cannot touch the same water twice, because the flow that has passed will never pass again. But so is thunder and lightning.” —Clint Eastwood. Today was fun.
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